was driving into the old historic section of town
and found Tim, one of the bartenders at The River City
Grill curled up on a curb alongside the road in tears.

I stopped the car and hollered over to him, "Hey, Tim,
what the hell happened to you?"

Wiping away his tears, he moaned, "Look at my new
convertible!"

He pointed to a crashed car down the street, wrapped
around a tree trunk.

"Shit, man, don't cry.

Get the insurance settlement and just buy another car,
" I level-headedly advised.

"Look inside the car," Tim moaned.

After looking, I continued to console him.

"Aww, dude, don't worry!

You can always find another blonde."

Tim looked at me and wailed agonizingly,
"Look inside her fcuking mouth!"

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